Notes
by Silent Nacht
Summary: History of Magic is the single greatest fear of bored students everywhere. Though for the Marauders, it's a chance to get creative about note passing. Contains no spoilers. Minor JL. Any comments are loved.


Details/Notes: I was bitten by this plot bunny late at night, and I'm at a loss to explain it. Just a bit of fun, I suppose. All comments appreciated, as always, and also as always, this hasn't been looked over by an outside source, just me, so all mistakes are mine. I'd love for them to be pointed out in a review so that I might fix them.

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_Excerpt From an Anonymous Text:_

_A (Real) History of Magic Overview_

History of Magic is the single greatest fear of bored students everywhere, though admittedly only the ones attending magical schooling know of it's existence. It is said that actually paying attention to the material is impossible, and that anyone who tries is doomed to a life filled with musty books, cold tea, and not much else; to later die buried in notes about Goblin wars and spend the rest of the afterlife lecturing about them.

Of course, these rumors aren't really true; not if you ask a professor of a legitimate study. But the fact remains that the History of Magic subject has given rise to the greatest number of ghostly teachers ever recorded.

Salem Witches Institute is actually one of only four schools (excluding the many that have dropped the subject all together) in which the position is still held by a living human.

The woman just celebrated her one hundred fiftieth birthday, and has been a professor there since the school formalized one hundred twenty five years ago.

She hasn't got long.

History of Magic is also well known for not actually teaching it's students anything; except, perhaps, creative ways of passing notes, as witnessed:

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P -

Frankie's drooling on Alice's scarf.

- Pads

* * *

Pads -

It's not like they're swapping fluids any other way.

- Prongs

* * *

P -

Push off, you're joking.

- Pads

* * *

Pads -

The Marauder's Map does not lie.

- Prongs

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James -

Be a bit more blatant next time. One guy in the back didn't notice you.

- Remus

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Moony -

Okay. Ta.

- Prongs

* * *

Prongs -

James Potter: Mortal Enemy of Sarcasm.

- Remus

* * *

M -

James says he loves you too.

- Pads

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Moony -

It's not like anyone cares.

- Wormtail

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Wormtail -

I don't think that's his point.

- Prongs

* * *

Prongs -

James Potter: Mortal Enemy of Sarcasm and Apathy.

- Remus

* * *

Moony -

Remus Lupin: In Great Danger of Getting His Face Punched In

- Prongs

* * *

Mr. Prongs,

My humblest apologies.

Sincerely,

Mr. Moony

* * *

Moony -

Oh, shove it.

- Prongs

* * *

Dear James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter,

If the four of you do not stop right now, I will have to report you to the professor.

Lily Evans

* * *

M -

If she can get Binn's attention.

- Pads

* * *

Padfoot -

She certainly got James'.

- Remus

* * *

Padfoot -

Is James sniffing Lily's parchment?

- Wormtail

* * *

W -

Yes, yes he is.

- Pads

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Lily -

Sorry about Tuesday.

I love you.

- James

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Dear James,

I told you this is against the rules. Don't get me into trouble.

Stop saying that.

Lily Evans

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Lily -

But it's true.

- James

* * *

P -

How was detention?

I think you set a record: first student in history to get in trouble during History of Magic.

- Pads

P.S. Why did this title go to you? What makes you so special?

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Pads -

Scrubbing the trophy case. Again.

- Prongs

P.S. I'm in love.

* * *

P -

See your name much?

- Pads

P.S. Gag me.

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James and Sirius,

The two of you could try paying attention for once, instead of acting like morons.

Lily Evans

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Evans -

What's there to pay attention to? I think I learn more than enough about Goblins just walking into Gringotts.

- Sirius Black

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Sirius,

If that's your belief I'd hate to see where you are in ten years.

Lily Evans

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Evans -

At least I won't die starving to death in a library. People are actually going to notice when something happens to me.

- Sirius

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Lily -

I'm sorry. Sirius is a jerk.

- James

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James,

Then why do you spend so much time with him.

Lily

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Lily -

He's my best friend.

- James

* * *

James,

You have lots of friends.

Lily

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Lily -

None of them are like Sirius. Plus, me and Remus and Peter's all he's got.

He can't help being a jerk.

- James

* * *

James,

It's not that difficult.

Lily

* * *

Lily -

Yeah, but he's the nice one in his family already.

- James

* * *

James,

We can talk after class.

Lily

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As of today's records, the only known student to keep detailed notes of the subject of History of Magic, having actually taken those notes during the class itself, is Hermione Granger of Hogwarts school.

It is also a little known fact around the grounds that the center of Hogwart's impressive rumor mill stems from the History of Magic classroom; all of the crazy stories manufactured out of nothing more than boredom and a spark of creativity. It is rumored that this creativity is the sole reason the class has not been scrapped to make room in the scheduling, but it is, after all, a rumor, and those cannot be trusted.

All in all, History of Magic and all of the various myths surrounding it, has a place in the records simply for succeeding time and time again at being the most boring, ill-remembered, and uneventful class in, well, the history of magic.

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End Notes: I hope you enjoyed it. Please review, I like it when my efforts are noticed.


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